September is Suicide Awareness Month

Every September, the conversation around suicide gets louder, but for families who have lived through it, the noise can feel disconnected from the quiet, complicated grief they carry every day.

Suicide Awareness Month was never meant to be just a hashtag or a ribbon. It's an invitation to have the honest, uncomfortable conversations that can actually save lives and support the people left behind.

What Suicide Awareness Month May Mean to People

For some, it's a time of validation, finally seeing their experience reflected in public conversation. For others, especially those who have lost someone to suicide, it can bring a complicated mix of relief and pain, or even feel performative when the awareness fades come October. For those who are currently struggling, the visibility can cut both ways, sometimes offering hope, sometimes amplifying shame. It's also worth noting that these responses aren't mutually exclusive. Someone might feel grateful for the conversation on Monday and exhausted by it on Friday. Holding that complexity, rather than expecting a single 'right' way to feel about awareness campaigns, is part of what makes this grief so isolating.

Phrases to Avoid and Alternatives to Say

What to Avoid: "Just go to therapy or talk to someone" What to Try: "Hey, how about we take a look at some therapists together and find one that you may feel most comfortable with."

What to Avoid: "You've been so lazy lately" What to Try: "Hey, I've noticed you have been isolating more and spending more time in bed."

What to Avoid: "You need to get out and finally do something outside of your home." What to Try: "Would you like to go for a walk together or get lunch and catch up together?"

What to Avoid: "Toughen up, it'll get better" What to Try: "I can tell something is different,

What to Avoid: "Why would you ever think of suicide?" What to Try: "When you mention suicide, it makes me think that you are looking to find a way to end the pain you are in, can we come up with some ways to address some of those painful things happening?"

What to Avoid: "They died years ago, why do you still feel this way?" What to Try: "I know this is the 3rd year anniversary of their passing, how are you feeling right now?"

What to Avoid: Avoiding the family or refraining from engaging in the conversation What to Try: "If you are feeling up to it, I would love to hear your favorite memories of them or look through some pictures of them together."

Signs That May indicate a Loved One is Considering Suicide

Not every warning sign looks like a crisis. Some of the most significant changes are quiet ones. This could look like the following: a loved one giving away belongings, withdrawing from people they love, or suddenly seeming calm after a period of intense distress. That unexpected calm can sometimes signal that a decision has been made, which is why it's worth paying attention even when things appear to be getting better.

How to Support a Loved One with Suicidal Thoughts

Knowing someone you love is struggling with suicidal thoughts can leave you feeling helpless, like anything you say might make things worse. The truth is, showing up, even imperfectly, matters more than having the right words. These tools can help you show up in ways that actually reach them. There is no one "perfect" way to support. Many times, it's not what you say, it's physically being present and opening your ears to their thoughts and feelings.

Resources

- 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline --> Call 988 or text 988 - CrisisTextLine --> Text HOME to 741741, connects you with a free, confidential, 24/7 Crisis Text Line counselor - Safe2help (https://www.safe2helpil.com/) --> 844-4-SAFEIL or text SAFE2 (72332), a 24/7 program for students to confidentially get help and to help others - The Trevor Project --> 24/7 Suicide Hotline for Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Youth: Call 1-866-488-7386 or text START to 678-678 - Veteran's Crisis Line --> Call 988, then select 1, or Crisis Chat, or text: 838255